Patience

Hahahahaha, this is funny.

My Long Term Disability and Social Security Disability decisions have been “extended” or “delayed” until mid November or December. But my Short Term Disability expired this week so I am supposed to go back to work. I’m counting up my vacation days today and the will get me closer to the LTD date of 11/15. But really, make up your mind. I have stage 4 of a rare terminal cancer, what’s so difficult about the decision?

So, I am struggling to be patient about this process 🙂 And here I am writing about patience.

My reading on this is not that we are asking God to make us more patience. We are really asking Him for His patience. He wants us to be completely dependent on Him, and this is one area where He really wants us to fall on Him. Trust in His patience and His timing and then the problem goes away.But we are living sacrifices and the problem with a living sacrifice is they crawl back off the altar too often.

We hand things over to God and say “your will be done, your timing” and then 5 minutes later we’re worrying about the issue again, and trying to manipulate things so it will hurry up and happen. Now I’m not talking about doing the duties required to keep processes moving. I’m talking about trying to manipulate the event to come about sooner than God’s plan.

Abraham did that a few times, and it didn’t work out for Abraham or Sarah or Hagar (or Ishmael).

Job complained about the unfairness of the world and the events that were taking him down. But God showed up and said “so what? Did you make the world? Do you know the events I have planned and the timing I have set up for them?” Job said “I’m speechless” as most people do when faced with the living God. He has it under control and it will likely take longer than we want. Live with it.

So, today I will make sure I claim correctly for vacation or sick days (chemo and eye doctor appointment seem to qualify) and I will leave the LTD and SSD to God’s timing. He is good, all the time. And all the time He i good. Trust Him. Trust his power and sovereignty and goodness.

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